If you’re reading this article then it’s probably because you’ve found the one that you’re ready to take that next big step with.
Moving in with your partner is indeed an indicator that your relationship is getting serious and it would be wise to get all the information you need to clear your doubts and to build your confidence.
These 15 questions that I have gathered for you in this article, are meant to provide you with points that you need to put into consideration if you’re going to push through with the decision of moving in with your partner.
It’s not only going to help foster a great communication with your partner about moving in together but it will inform you on whether or not your relationship is ready and solid enough to take that ‘big step.’
Here are 15 vital questions to ask your partner before moving in with them, I assure that you would find them helpful.
List of 15 Questions to Ask Your Partner Before Moving In With Them.
- Do you think our relationship is ready for this next big step that we are about to take?
- Do you snore when you sleep at night?
- How are we going to decorate the house to suit both our tastes?
- Would you like a pet in the house with us or not?
- What’s your thoughts on letting family members stay with us?
- Are you the type that likes home cooked meals or likes to order outside.
- How are we going to get groceries in the house? Do we split the bill?
- What happens to the house if we break up?
- Do we have enough money to handle the maintenance of the house?
- Are you the type that comes home late at night?
- What happens if we get tired of seeing each other’s faces everyday? Can we give each other some space?
- Do you think moving in together will bring us closer?
- Are you the type that would leave the house and not come back for days if we get in a fight?
- Who is going to do the dishes?
- How often are we going to be intimate if we’re going to live together?
Do you think our relationship is ready for this next big step that we are about to take?
This is a genuine question to ask your partner, offering that you move in with them especially for a relationship that’s just started or known to have a history of violence or toxicity.
Not every relationship thrives when both partners live together, in fact it could be the doom of the relationship because of diverse differences in lifestyle and home management.
Ask your partner if you think your relationship is strong enough to handle seeing each other everyday and not getting tired or perhaps handling some of your annoying habits.
All it takes is for you to hold their hand, look them in the eye sincerely, and ask them this question.
Other ways you can ask this question is;
- Is our relationship going to survive if we live together?
- How can our relationship thrive if we live together?
Do you snore when you sleep at night?
Many people don’t ask this question when planning to move in with their partner because they think it’s not important and that’s not one hundred percent true.
Your partner denying you sleep because of their loud snoring at night could be an opening for you to begin disliking them, ultimately ruining the relationship.
You have to ask them beforehand so that you can evaluate within yourself if you can handle your partner snoring next to you, before proceeding to moving in with them rather than finding out after, when you no longer have a choice.
- I would like to know if you can handle me snoring at night?
- Hope you don’t snore loudly while you sleep?
How are we going to decorate the house to suit both our taste?
When you move in with your partner it is crucial to ask a question that makes you know if they care about your style of home decoration or your input in making decisions.
This question makes it easy for you to know if the house you’re moving into would feel like home.
From their response, you would be able to tell if you’re truly wanted with them because decorating the house in a way that pleases both parties means that the house is meant for two people who love each other and cherishes each others’ opinion.
- Can I make some changes to the decorations of the house?
- I would like to get a new sofa for the living room and make little changes, is that fine with you?
Would you like a pet in the house with us or not?
This is a vital question to ask your partner before moving in with them especially if you’re not a lover of animals and your partner is.
It’s good if you’re on the same page about keeping certain pets in the house just for the other party to be comfortable in the house.
Imagine if you’re the type that would love a puppy running around the house and your partner is terrified of dogs then it wouldn’t be smart to live with such a person if you can’t compromise.
It would be unfair to make them change that part of them if they aren’t willing to.
- I really want a dog in the house, do you?
- Having a pet in the house isn’t a bad idea, right?
What’s your thoughts on letting family members stay with us?
Amongst the questions to ask your partner before you move in is this very important question and should be approached with wit and no intention of disrespecting your partner.
You as a person might want to have the house opened to your family members staying as long as they want while your partner would appreciate being alone with you in the house.
You have to evaluate how close they are with their family to know if you will be able to live with them because overtime, the case could be that you’re living with your partner and his family member(s).
For example, you could ask them while having a casual conversation to lighten the mood and to get their honest opinion on the topic.
Are you the type that likes home cooked meals or likes to order outside.
Your partner might like home made meals cooked by you while you like to eat out, it’s important that you agree on this as this helps you navigate if you could compromise on cooking food everyday or meeting each other halfway in your decision.
If you’re comfortable living with your partner it would be because they don’t stress you out or don’t make you do things that you would rather not do which makes this question a crucial one to achieve.
You love your partner but you still have to think about the sacrifice of waking up every morning to prepare a meal for them because they like you doing so.
How are we going to get groceries in the house? Do we split the bill?
Asking questions around handling finances with your partner is another brilliant way to properly make your decision.
Ask them if they intend to split the bills equally or make it one sided as this would help build the relationship as it moves.
Would it be your partner getting the groceries from the store everytime or would it be you? Do you buy groceries this month and then you buy for the next?
These questions can be asked in a variety of ways.
All you have to do is ask in a way that it passes the message that you want your partner to be financially responsible and accountable to you if you’re going to be moving in with them.
What happens to the house if we break up?
Perhaps you’re buying the house together or you paid rent on the house for a month and then you break up, what happens?
Even though breaking up isn’t what the relationship goal is, it’s also smart to consider the fact that it might happen. If it does, then what next?
Your partner should be able to answer a question like this to make you get the full picture of the result of breaking up with them at some point.
If you don’t ask a lot of questions, this should be one of the questions you decide to ask them because you’re going to get a lot of information with it.
You could also say something like;
- Do we have to sell the house if we break up?
- What if we break up? Then what?
Do we have enough money to handle the maintenance of the house?
Maintaining the house can only be accomplished with a partner that is financially stable and that’s why you need to ask this question.
You don’t want to move in and have to fight about who is going to financially take care of the house, get broken things in the house fixed and pay other bills in the house.
You have to make an arrangement through this question that this is how you want to live with them if you move in with them for you to be comfortable and to avoid quarreling in the future.
If you don’t want to ask that way you could ask in another style;
- Who is going to pay the bills in the house?
- Are we splitting electricity and phone bills in the house?
Are you the type that comes home late at night?
If you love your sleep and would not appreciate anyone who disturbs it then you would want to ask your partner this question.
This would be good for people who get easily worried and wouldn’t want to get worked up if their partner isn’t back to the house at a late hour.
This question could lead to another question that could lead you to knowing why they return home late and also be a factor to consider. Are they late night party animals?
Does their job require them to return late? You would be able to find the answer to these questions before deciding to move in with your partner if you can handle it.
- Do you come home late? If yes, why?
- Do you come home wasted a lot?
What happens if we get tired of seeing each other’s faces everyday? Can we give each other some space?
You might get tired of living in the same environment, seeing the same person constantly, for a long period of time.
This is a question that would help you get clarity on the step to take when that time comes.
Do you get to go on a vacation separately or together? If you decide to leave the house for a while, would your partner be fine with that without getting hurt or feeling unwanted.
Do you think moving in together will bring us closer?
Moving in together with your partner could either create a positive change or a negative one.
For the type of relationship you have with your partner, it is important to ask them if they think that moving in with them is what the relationship needs and if it would make the relationship healthier.
What if you move in with your partner and you begin to quarrel and drift apart? To avoid that happening, you have to ask what they think this next step would do to your relationship with them.
Are you the type that would leave the house and not come back for days if we get in a fight?
There are different ways people deal with anger and when you’re leaving with a person and you had a fight with them, storming off could be one of the ways they relieve stress.
You might be the type that would want to talk about the problem and settle it immediately but your partner has left the house for days which could make you upset and might lead to the end of the relationship.
It’s essential you ask them this question to know their perspective on it.
Who is going to do the dishes?
Doing the dishes in the house is a chore that most people try to avoid in the house. You must ask your partner this question to be able to create a plan around doing chores in the house.
You might like doing the dishes while you hate cleaning the toilet, you just have to ask them their thoughts about chores and how they deal with it living alone and how they intend to tackle it if you move in with them.
How often are we going to get intimate if we’re going to live together?
For active relationships, living together could either increase your drive or decrease it as a result of lack of excitement since you’re seeing the person everyday.
Do they intend to have more intimacy with you if you start living with them or keep it at the same pace at which you were with them?
You need clarity on this especially if you’re the type of person with a low drive unlike your partner.
Final words
There isn’t any crime in asking questions, it takes asking to be able to receive information or something specifically from someone (partner).
This is why it is important that before you move in with your partner, you ask these 15 vital questions and then proceed to make your decision.
