Do you have an inmate boyfriend? Are you looking for ways to keep the spark alive in your relationship?
Being in a long-distance relationship can be quite difficult. However, no one’s ever prepared to date someone in prison.
But life happens, and no one can predict how the future will turn out to be.
So, if it turns out that your boyfriend ends up in prison, I understand how difficult you think it’d be. You’ve probably worried yourself out thinking if things would remain the same.
Fortunately, I’m here to let you know that you can keep the bond in your relationship strong and even make it stronger while he’s confined to the four walls of a prison.
In this article, I’ll take you through 20 questions you can ask your inmate boyfriend to keep the spark alive.
20 Questions to Ask Your Inmate Boyfriend to Keep the Spark Alive
Communication is key in every relationship, especially when there are some limitations like distance, and in this case, imprisonment.
There are a lot of things to ask your inmate boyfriend to ensure constant communication, to keep the spark alive.
Asking about his day, what he intends to achieve after his days in prison, what he misses about the world outside, and how you can support him are ways to show your care while keeping the fire burning.
Below are 20 questions to ask your inmate boyfriend to maintain a strong bond and nurture your relationship while he’s away:
- How are you doing today?
- What do you do daily?
- What is the first thing you’ll do once you get out?
- What do you intend to achieve when you get out?
- How can I support you and help you stay positive during this time?
- What’s something you miss most about the outside world?
- What are your favorite memories of us?
- What do you enjoy doing most in this place?
- What’s your least favorite part of this place?
- What do you do when you feel down?
- Do you always think about me?
- How can we stay connected and strengthen our bond?
- What books, movies, or hobbies interest you?
- What are your challenges?
- Have you made friends?
- What’s the new skill you look forward to learning?
- What activities can we do together once you’re free?
- What country would you love us to travel together to?
- Are you looking forward to our anniversary?
- What have you planned for our future together?
How Are You Doing Today? (Show Care)
One of the best questions to ask your inmate boyfriend to keep the spark alive in your relationship is how he’s doing at that particular time.
This question may sound simple and too casual, but it carries enough weight to show your care and love for him. And when asked with the right emotions, it can make him spill more than you ask for.
Moreover, asking how he’s doing that day shows you’re interested in knowing how that day is going and how it’s affecting him. It’s a question you can ask when you’re on a call with him or when you visit.
What Do You Do Daily? (Stay Informed about His Daily Routine)
Another question to ask your inmate boyfriend concerns what he does daily.
Prisoners often have a calendar or timetable that guides them. They have a particular time to wake, shower, eat, work, and rest.
Although they’re allowed to enjoy their free time as they wish, prisoners are usually guided by a schedule.
So, this is the type of question to ask your boyfriend to show you’re interested in knowing how he spends his day. Also, it’s a great question to keep him talking when you visit.
What Is the First Thing You’ll Do Once You Get Out?
Most prisoners who’re not sentenced to life imprisonment look forward to when they’ll get out.
So, your boyfriend should probably be looking forward to when he’ll get out. And there’s something he has in mind to do first once he gets out.
It might be to give you the biggest hug, to see his family, to feed his cat, to take a walk, or even the weirdest of things.
Therefore, asking him what he intends to do first when he gets out is a great way to get him excited. Also, it’s a beautiful topic for discussion, as you get to hear his thoughts about his freedom and how enthusiastic he feels about it.
It’s a good bet to keep the spark alive in your relationship.
What Do You Intend to Achieve When You Get Out? (Encourage Positivity)
Everyone has goals and aspirations, whether they’re in prison or not. So, your inmate boyfriend probably has a big plan for when he gets out.
And if he doesn’t, asking him what he intends to achieve when he gets out is the best way to set him rolling.
This question is not only a great way to communicate and maintain the bond in your relationship, it’s a smart way to encourage him to look forward to life after prison.
Being confined to a particular place is not what anyone wishes for, and it can be very difficult for anyone in that state to adjust. Moreover, people adjust to situations differently.
So, if your boyfriend is finding it hard to adjust and is yet to think about life after prison, this question is a great starter for him.
How Can I Support You and Help You Stay Positive During This Time? (Offer Help and Encouragement)
As I’ve previously established, people adjust to situations differently. And being in prison is never going to be easy on anyone no matter how tough they appear.
If your partner is in prison, they’ll need every form of support and encouragement from you. And sometimes when we think we’ve got it figured out, they might not be receiving it well.
Moreover, you might not even have any idea how to support them.
Notwithstanding, a great way to start is by asking them how you can support and help them stay positive.
Asking your inmate boyfriend this question doesn’t only strengthen your bond, it shows them your commitment to the relationship and your concern for them.
Who knows, it might just be what he needs to get him to cheer up.
What’s Something You Miss Most About the Outside World? (Share Memories)
Being restricted to a particular place means you’re in the dark about what’s going on in other places. And as humans, it’s natural to miss the outside world and long for it.
There are many things your inmate boyfriend is missing about the outside and his former life. It could be the time spent with you, his work, his hobbies, and what may be.
Asking him about these things is a great way to reminisce together on memories you share. Also, it’s a beautiful way to put a smile on his face, as he talks about these things.
What Are Your Favorite Memories of Us? (Rekindle Special Moments)
Another beautiful way to reminisce on fond memories with your inmate boyfriend is by asking what his favorite memories of you both are.
This question is not only a way to have a romantic discussion and keep the fire burning, but it’s also a way to keep him looking forward to creating beautiful memories with you.
Moreover, it’s a great way to spend time together, as you both recall funny times you spent together, from the weirdest to the craziest things you’ve done together.
In addition, it’s a smart way to get his mind off his current situation and help him have a good time and always look forward to your visit.
What Do You Enjoy Doing Most in This Place? (Talk About His Interests)
While their situation might seem sad, there must be something a prisoner enjoys doing, especially those who’ve adjusted to their new life.
So, asking your inmate boyfriend what he enjoys doing the most in prison is a reasonable question.
As I’ve already established, prisoners have a daily schedule they follow. So, it could be that your boyfriend enjoys talking with his colleagues, it could be the food, it could be the work he does or skills he learns, or the books he reads or movies he watches.
Ask him about these things and watch him talk excitedly about his interests.
What’s Your Least Favorite Part of This Place? (Discuss His Disinterests)
Another thing you can discuss with your inmate boyfriend is his least favorite part of being in prison.
Start by asking him about the things he doesn’t like. It could be the food, the wake-up time, following the schedule, or anything.
Hear what he has to say, listen to his frustration, and make him feel heard. In this way, you’re not only providing a listening ear, you’re also providing emotional support, validating his feelings, and strengthening your bond.
What Do You Do When You Feel Down?
Yes, your inmate boyfriend will feel down once in a while, no matter how strong he appears. Even if he has adjusted well, there are times he’d think about life outside and be moody.
So, this question is another great way to engage him in a conversation. Asking him these questions can let him open up about how much things are affecting him.
And it can also help you suggest ways he can overcome the sadness whenever it tries to overwhelm him.
Do You Always Think About Me?
Another reasonable question to ask your inmate boyfriend is, “Do you always think about me?”
This is a cute and flirty question you can pose to him to get him in a romantic mood. Of course, he should think about you if he cares about you.
So, this question is just a way to lighten the mood and allow him to reaffirm his love for you.
You can follow up with a reply of yours about how much you miss him too.
How Can We Stay Connected and Strengthen Our Bond? (Discuss Communication and Visits)
Asking your inmate boyfriend how you can both remain connected and strengthen the bond you share is a great way to express your commitment to the relationship.
First, things are bound to change because of his confinement; limited time for communication, less to no physical touch depending on the facility guidelines, and few visits, are some of the things that change.
So, for the bond you share to remain strong, you both need to put in effort. Therefore, this question is crucial to remind you both of the effort you need to put in to keep the spark alive.
What Books, Movies, or Hobbies Interests You? (Discuss Common Interest)
Another thing to ask your inmate boyfriend to keep his interest is about the books, movies, and things that interest him.
Reading and watching movies are some of the ways inmates use their free time. These activities are great in helping them maintain their self-awareness.
So, raise these questions with your boyfriend; discuss books you’ve both read and movies you’ve both watched. This way, you’ll be able to engage him in things that interest him and make your visit worth it.
Moreover, it’ll help you know the kind of books to gift him and the kind of movies to suggest he watch.
What Are Your Challenges? (Discuss Difficulties He Experiences)
Everyone experiences challenges in life, and your inmate lover is not spared from them. So, one of the questions you can ask him is about the challenges he faces.
Whatever they might be, it could be difficulty in sleeping, having a quiet time, making friends, etc. Help him see with this question that you’re interested in everything about him, including the difficulties he’s facing.
With this, you’ll make it easier for him to be more open to you. In addition, you can also share your insights on how he manages these challenges.
There’s nothing better than two lovers who can stand through for each other, and this act is one of the ways to be there for your boyfriend.
Have You Made Friends?
“Have you made friends?” is another question you can ask your inmate boyfriend.
It’s a good question that shows you’re interested in his prison life. It’s something you can throw in during a casual conversation, or you could start with it for the day.
Also, it’s a great way to offer help and encouragement if he has been finding it difficult to adjust and talk to people.
What’s the New Skill You Look Forward to Learning?
Another beautiful way to engage your boyfriend in prison whenever you visit is to ask him about the new skills he’s set to acquire.
Prisoners are given opportunities to learn and acquire skills while serving their term. So, you can have these discussions with your boyfriend to help him see the need to key into the opportunity.
You both can brainstorm together on what he can learn. Besides having a great time together, you’re preparing him for life after prison.
What Activities Can We Do Together Once You’re Free? (Keep the Interest in the Relationship Alive)
Another fantastic way to keep the fire burning with your inmate boyfriend is to ask him about things that involve both of you.
“What activities can we do together once you’re free?” is a smart question to ask him. You can hear what he has in mind before you two can brainstorm together.
It could be exercising, meditation, dates, hikes, cooking, and several more. Doing healthy things together as a couple is one of the beautiful ways to nurture your relationship.
Additionally, it’s a great way to keep him looking forward to getting out.
What Country Would You Love Us to Travel Together to?
You can also ask your inmate boyfriend about what country you can travel to together.
This question shows him that you’re interested in a future with him and you’re eagerly looking forward to it.
Also, it’s a wonderful way to spend your visit together, to get his mind off his present state, and to remind him that you can still have a beautiful future despite the present.
Are You Looking Forward to Our Anniversary?
“Are you looking forward to our anniversary?” is another good question to ask your inmate boyfriend to keep the spark alive.
If your anniversary is approaching and he’s yet to talk about it, bring it up this way. He might just be feeling sad that he might’ve spoilt things for you.
So, let him know that you can still have a great anniversary with him in prison. Also, with this question, you’re assuring him of your commitment to the relationship.
What Have You Planned for Our Future Together? (Look Forward to a Shared Future)
Another smart way to get you and your inmate boyfriend talking about your future together is to ask him what his plans are for the future together.
Not only does this question show that you’re ready to have a future with him, assuring him of your love, but it also provides an opportunity to truly discuss your future with him.
Moreover, if he’s still dragging his feet, this question will serve as a way to encourage him to be more positive about the future.
Final Words
Having an inmate boyfriend is never going to be easy. However, if he truly cares about you and is ready to fight for your love, it’s going to be easier if you want the same thing too.
If you’ve run out of things to discuss with him, these 20 questions are where you can start. They’re great questions that show him you’re very much interested in the relationship, thus keeping the spark alive.
Moreover, it’s a beautiful way to engage him whenever you visit.
Additionally, remember to show your support, listen to him, and always stay positive. Your love, encouragement, and positive attitude can make a great difference in his life and your relationship during this challenging time.